Bye bye turtle shells...

I know I'm late at posting this but my surgery went really well and I would be recovering faster if I'd stop over doing it every other day.

The day before my surgery I found out that my report time was 5:30a.m.!  Needless to say I didn't sleep well the night before and my driving habits on the way to the VA almost gave Darin a heart attack.  Everything was going well and I was ready for surgery.  Anesthesia came in and said she was going to start my IV...no big deal I was young and had good veins.  Well she didn't know where they were because by the time they wheeled me in for surgery I had four IV's and she still wasn't happy any of them.

Surgery went as planned and after a little recovery time in post-op I was sent home.  I have to say I really don't remember much of the ride home or most of the evening for that matter.     

However, fast forward three weeks later and I am recovering nicely.  I went in for my check up and Dr. L says everything is healing as planned and she doesn't need to see me again till April 12, 2013.

My bed is still a construction zone and I'm really getting tired of wearing a sports bra 24/7 but all in all I'm doing really good.  I'm really happy to no longer have the turtle shells!

I wanted to get this posted but I will continue to update more in the next few days.      

Graduation

It's official I am the recipient of a Bachelors of Science in Psychology with a minor in Sociology.  It took me more years than I care to admit but I am finished with my undergraduate degree.  I will be taking some time off to recoup from my surgery but after that I will be job hunting until I get accepted into graduate school.  I know many of you are shaking your head in disbelief that I want to go back to school but I can't do anything with a psychology degree, I at least need my Ph.D.  I have to take the Graduate Record Examination (GRE) on June 8th but then I will be applying to doctoral programs in the fall.  

Me with my loving husband and wonderful boys.

Me, my husband and wonderful in-laws.

Under Construction...

I think the title is fitting considering that's how I feel right now.  My bed is still a construction zone of pillows and I'm starting to feel like I'm stuck in a construction zone with speed restrictions.  However, I do see the flashing light at the end of road .


January 3rd is my next surgery date.  I will be trading out my turtle shells for something a little softer.

But first, I have to make it through finals this week and graduation on December 15th at 2:30 p.m. (I'll post pictures as soon as I can).  

The Zombie Apocalypse has arrived...

 but, Brendyn saved the day.

Needless to say...Halloween 2012 was a blast!

Just some pics...

We can make sisters but not twins...

On my way to the VA today I was all excited about the idea of exchanging my tissue expanders for implants but then...I explained to Dr. C and Dr. L that when I tried on the bra size that I want to be after the exchange, I didn't quite fill the bra all the way (and truth be told, my days of stuffing with kleenex are waaayyyy behind me).  I told them, that I have given up on the idea of seeing perfection when I look in the mirror, I just want to be happy with how my bra and shirts fit.  I know I haven't posted any before and after pictures on here but don't start thinking I have frankenboobs either.

I'm sure many of you have heard of women's breasts being referred to as "the twins" and if you haven't...now you know.  After I finished going on about how I felt the left one was a little more off to the side than the right one and I like the shape of the right one...Dr. C and Dr. L both made the comment "we can make sisters, but we can't make twins".  I thought that's so true and perfect, I can't wait to put that on my blog.     

I thought after the last "fill-up" I was at the max but Dr. C said I still had more room, I was only at 730 cc's.  So after a little more discussion we decided to "fill-up" one last time.  Dr. L explained that the expanders and implants are not exactly the same size and shape so when they exchange them, the implants will be about 30% smaller than the expanders.  So without the "fill-up" today, I would have to use kleenex or worse go down a bra size after the exchange.

Dr. C did the honors of inserting the really big needle in after he found the port using the magnetic finder.  One thing was different this time, I thought I felt a slight tug from the magnetic finder (could be my imagination) but it was different.  Unlike previous fills, where I felt the needle go in on the right side, this time I didn't feel anything.  FYI: the refrigerator magnets didn't stay on...I had to try, I would have always wondered if they would have (I know everyone is laughing at the mental image of me trying to do this).

I've been home for about two hours and I feel good.  I was worried, I would get home and have to take a muscle relaxer and pain pill, but so far no pain.  They just feel...heavier.

Just so everyone is clear, I won't be having surgery on October 24th.  My next appointment is on November 2nd, I'm sure we will discuss when my next surgery will be during that appointment.

I haven't complained about the VA too much lately, not that they did a complete overhaul of the system and it magically got better, I simply haven't had the time.  Over the past seven years I have had my fair share of doctors who have come and gone...some didn't go, as fast I wanted them to.  So it is uncommon that I have a doctor that I absolutely love and dread the day when I find out they are moving on to better things.  When I first met Dr. C, he told me that he would be finishing up his residency around the end of October. So I can't say I wasn't expecting it but it's also the reason I wanted to have my surgery on October 24th before he left.  He and Dr. L have taken such good care of me over the last five months, they really make a great team.  I remember my first visit with them and how they emphasized the importance of getting to know each other and feeling comfortable with them as my surgeons.  So, I'm grateful that I'm not loosing Dr. L at the same time, I know she will still take great care of me.  I can't remember his name but I will meet my new surgeon in November...he has some pretty big shoes to fill, Dr. C set the bar high. 




    

Custom order...

I had my last "fill-up" about two weeks ago to fully expand my turtle shells.  I have started calling the expanders my "turtle shells" because to be honest it's what they feel like.  I never thought I would be ready for another surgery but I am very much ready to exchange the shells for something a lot softer.

I guess I can start the count down again...13 days to go till surgery time, again (October 24, 2012).

This coming Friday the 12th I'm going to the VA for my pre-op appointment with plastics to talk about my custom order ta ta's.  No pressure, though.  I’ll only be stuck with them for ten to fifteen years.

I'm happy to say that I'm starting to get back to "normal", if there is such a thing.  School is going well and I'm not nearly as exhausted as I was two weeks ago.   I'm even starting to get back to my normal night owl routine (could explain why I'm blogging at 1 a.m.).

I found a few interesting web sites and I wanted to share them with everyone who may be faced with the same situation or just interested.

The first one is Vinnie Myers, he has helped pioneer a niche in tattooing images of nipples and areolas on women who have undergone surgery for breast cancer.  He helps rebuild psyches as well as bodies, providing closure to women who have endured the long, exhausting ordeal and are looking to move on with their lives.

http://www.vinniemyers.com

My second web page is for rub on nipples.  I know! Amazing idea right!  I was surprised when I found this website and if I wasn't for my research skills and online digging, I would have never found it.


http://www.rubonnipples.com

H E double hockey sticks I'm in pain today!

My bed is like a construction site of pillows in an attempt to find a semi-comfortable sleeping position...no such luck yet.  I can't wait to see the doctor today and find out if the excruciating pain I am experiencing is what he would consider normal.

I don't get it, it only hurts on the left side!  Last night was unbearable, I was in pain on the left side and the right side was itching so bad.  I just don't understand how I can feel so much pain in my left breast yet I can't feel my nails scratching desperately to reach the itching in the right breast.  At 3 a.m. I finally took some Benadryl and either it stopped the itching or just made me fall asleep...either way I was happy.  

When Dr. C asked how I was doing I said I was doing good and immediately Darin jumped in to say - don't let her lie to you!  I was going to get to the part about the pain...just give me a minute.   

After describing the pain they decided that it was best if I didn't get a "fill-up" today.  Instead I'm going to try and take muscle relaxers this weekend and follow up on Monday.  If things don't improve I will need to go in for an ultrasound this Wednesday.  

A few hours after I got home...

   

Fill' er up...

Today was my first expander "fill-up"...As usual I wasn't sure how this was going to happen or if it was going to hurt.  To give everyone an idea of what's going on below the skin I have included a picture of the expander.

In the center is a metal port that is used to insert the needle for each fill.  I didn't try it out at home but I would be lying if I said I didn't want to try and stick refrigerator magnets on chest to see if they would stay (I may still try this, for fun...of course).  

Dr. C used a little magnetic tool to confirm the location of the port and applied a little pressure to mark the spot.  I asked for the smallest needle to be used but apparently the saline goes into too slow with a small needle so I get what felt like an Exxon pipe line.  It was really only a normal size needle but to me it was huge.  I was told I may not feel the needle go in because of numbness but I could feel it go in on the left side but not the right.  Most of the time I am all over wanting to see everything going on but I couldn't get the image of Mia (Uma Thurman) in the movie Pulp Fiction out of my head.  For those of you who haven't seen the movie, this scene is after Mia overdoses on drugs.

Lance:  You're going to give her an injection of adrenaline directly to her heart.  But she's got, uh, breastplate... [taps Mia's chest] 

Lance:  So you gotta pierce through that.  So what you have to do is, you have to bring the needle down in a stabbing motion. [demonstrates] 

Vincent: I - I gotta stab her .....and he stabs her in the heart with a very large needle. 

So after she gets that home-administered adrenaline shot, she gains consciousness with the needle still stuck in her chest. Ughh. Say no to drugs, kids. 

Sorry, I got a little off track there...my needle experience didn't have the same protracted agony as Mia's but in my head it was just as bad.  If Darin was writing this blog it would say how awesome it was to sit off to the side and watch my breast grow by the second.  In five minutes Dr. C was able to create what mother nature failed to do in five years.  I guess you could say I'm like a blow up doll.   

It wasn’t painful at the time, but at this very moment I feel like I bench pressed an elephant.

Recovering nicely...

I'm feeling really good today.  I went to the doctor on Friday and after flashing everyone in the room the final consensus was...the left drain could come out but the right one has to stay in a little longer.  I wasn't sure how bad the drain removal would be but it didn't hurt at all (could have been the two pain pills I took) but it just felt...funny.  I thought they would give me a stitch or two because it's not just a paper cut...it's a hole in my side for pete's sake!  But no...I only got a 4x4 folded in half and some tape.  Trying to be funny I asked the doctor taking out the drain if it was his first time too...he laughed and said no "it's my third".  All in all everyone is really happy with how things are looking and with my progress. 

I have been trying to wean myself off the pain pills the last two days and it's going as expected.  Now I don't want everyone reading this to think I have turned in to some pill popping animal.  But school started last week so in an attempt to make it to school on Tuesday I need to not be so medicated. 

Just so everyone is clear I'm not having any of the following symptoms...hysterical crying fits, banging my head into walls, tremors, nausea, vomiting, severe headache, seizures, increase in pulse and blood pressure, drug craving, runny nose, yawning (maybe a little), sweating, insomnia, weakness, stomach cramps, diarrhea, muscle spasms, chills, and irritability (I already had this symptom).  As I was saying...I just want to be able to drive to school on Tuesday and not get a DUI.  Not only that but I tried to read some of my textbook the other day and the words started moving around on the paper and looked all blurry...so I'm going to have to read that chapter again because I don't remember anything I read.  

So instead of taking pain pills during the day I'm trying to only take them at night and if I do have to take one today or tomorrow I might try taking half or even switch over to good ole' Advil.  You don't ever hear of Advil addicts...